When I was heavier, I felt bombarded with images of thin, smooth-skinned, tall ladies as ‘beautiful’. If it was North American media, then tanned vixens. And if Bollywood media, then fair-skinned maidens. No one looked like me: pear-shaped, bespectacled, with frizzy unkempt waves & darker skinned… unless it was an actor who played an evil Bollywood mom. Or, was the star of a self-named comedy show (see posts on Tips 1-4, 5-8, 9-10). And I wasn’t any of those adjectives either!

And these thin women were portrayed as The Ultimate Show Ponies, dripping with confidence, promise, fulfilling lifestyles, happiness and sex appeal. Today, I say “Bravo!” to advertising and entertainment sectors for the deep ingrainment. They worked hard to get that image across.  At the time, it didn’t occur to me that I didn’t know anyone else that looked like that, either. Move over Manson² and Heaven’s Gate, Media is the Ultimate brainwasher.

Keep in mind, my teen years were spent poring over glossy magazines with shiny images, talking on the phone with friends, and watching TV. We didn’t have internet or cell phones. My escape was TV and staying up late reading books¹. So growing up with rigid ideas of what the perfect 2-D body looks like makes a regular 3-D girl feel less-than.

In all honesty I thought once I lost weight³, I would be happier. Things would magically fall into place. Of course this is real-life, not a fairy tale.

Happiness is something you attain. It is not bestowed upon you.

I had to really think about what would make me happy. I love reading, photography, the theatre

and writing. I love all kinds of dance. I am happy when beautiful things surround me: people, clothes, art, wine, food. And I am happy after I have challenged myself.

I try to do things to push my personal boundaries like co-writing this blog. (Yes, I love writing but it’s not easy to put yourself out there.) I’ve taken loads of pictures, in public. Then put up these up for you all to see.

And last week, I started a burlesque class with Kells. Yes, burlesque. I love how bawdy, welcoming, tongue-in-cheek, flirty, raucous it is. And we had no idea about its fabulously clandestine history. 

This is an intro class, with a lovely range of ladies across sizes, ages, shapes and abilities. About one third took the class to push themselves, have fun and become more comfortable in their own skin.  Some of the same reasons as N&K!

I would say I’m a happier person, having pushed personal boundaries and embracing all aspects of myself. Am I positive and happy 100% of the time? Of course not. Real life has ups and downs. But if you want to lead a more fulfilling lifestyle…

you gotta wake the F up. Self-evaluate and make a plan of change.

Don’t just chug along with life. Grab it by the horns and point it in the right direction!

Footnotes
1 Thanks Judy Blume, Stephen King, Danielle Steele, Isaac Asimov for keeping me up too late
2 Charles, not Marilyn
3 According to a female family member, all I needed to do in my teen years, was lose weight, get rid of unsightly zits and get toss the glasses. (She was unsure of this last thing, as presumably, there were attractive librarians with glasses.) This aunt was a solid support to me. She never lied. But, she encouraged my strengths and didn’t let me forget them. And I adored her. (She was the next best thing to sliced bread!) So when she gave me this unsolicited bit of advice, which came out of the blue, I was heartbroken.

This week Nals

will be reviewing Katy Perry’s Katy Kat Eye mascara (by Covergirl).

Their kitch

. . . is the sculpting brush.
Indeed this is a swashbuckling brush, all swirly and packed with bristles. It applies the product to your lashes, with luscious accuracy.

Red dot eyes show results after 2 coats

drawback

The product is a bit thick so wipe it off real good before applying. (The first time I used it, I didn’t and ended up with a gd huge black molten glob in my eye… and had to trash the contact¹.) The issue may not lie in the mascara’s viscosity, but rather, the scooping expanse of the brush.

Conclusion?

Defo try this mascara… but not ideal for the novice user.
Footnote:
¹Truth be told, the black glob looked like something out of X-Files.

To read previous Mascara Reviews, please search our Mascara Monday tag.

We’ve heard about fat shaming before – and most of us know about this first hand malheuresment– but never vulva shaming.
A good jumping off point is Wrenna Robertson’s blog post “Starting the conversation“. Vulva shaming is when 1 person chastises another female’s vulva for the way it looks. Typically the complaints are: tissue is too big, too flappy or just plain misshapen.

Let’s all take a moment to pause to really absorb this concept.

I can’t imagine saying to anyone, “Hey girl, you gotta do something about that snaggly-looking vulva.”

With the world we live in, can we not give each other a break? We’re now searching for fodder below the belt? How ludicrous to fault the look of something that’s not in our control.

Okay then how do you know what it’s supposed to look like?

Firstly, let’s get anatomical terms in order.
Vagina = the internal parts of female gentalia.
Vulva = umbrella term for external genitalia including both sets of labia & mons. Most of us have used the term vag or vagina when we were actually referring to the vulva.

The Vision of the V

Lo and behold, there is a wide variety colours, sizes and shapes of vulvas. There is no right and wrong.
Check out the variety at the informational website Australia’s Labia Library.¹
Since you are likely not in adult entertainment², comparing your A,B,Vs (or someone else’s) to that of a pornographic star’s is unfair. A lot of stars alter the way their bodies look: piercings, labiaplasty, skin bleaching, skin fillers, skin tighteners, etc. The playing field is not level. In fact, there’s nothing playful about this nonsense.

But really I think something is awry with my V

Just like other bodily tissue, vulvas can also get troubled or… start off troubled. If you feel or see something funny, feel or see a change or you’re just not sure, then get checked under the proverbial hood by a trusted gynecologist.

If you have been vulva (or ­body) shamed

please speak with a licensed health professional such as through the Canadian Psychology Association or American Psychology Association. And speak out against this inappropriate, unhelpful behaviour.

If you have engaged in vulva (body) shaming

then you need to get your issues sorted toute fg suite. The vulvas around you will look different from yours. You are probably not an expert³ on vulvar anatomy so please don’t embody one.

For more info on vulvar issues:
The V Book
National Vulvodynia Association
Society of Obstetricians and Gynecologists of Canada
American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists
The National Women’s Health Information Center
International Vulval Society
Footnotes
¹Wow a Labia Library? Yes N&Kers, those Aussies go down under to get the real goods on the goods.
²If you are in the adult entertainment field, consider the emo impact of how your body looks to others. Consider about non-intrusive methods to enhance body parts. Or better yet, go au naturel.
³And if you are an expert, vulva shaming is neither considered good bedside manner nor is it helpful.

So we gave it a go and… here’s our restaurant review¹.

The place is like a mansion! Kells, our friend Cutie T and I took a couple pix in their lobby.

You go up 2 flights of old timey hardwood stairs then you have the bar on one side and the dining area. Dining area also contains a patio and glass atrium. The latter 2 sitting areas have a dreamy view of the water.
WAG is kind of casual – in our pinup hair-and-makeup, we stood out like 3 (gorgeous) sore thumbs.
We ordered off of the PNW inspired WAG menu : Lobster Stuffed Ravioli, dinner special surf and turf and Stuffed Chicken.

But first we started with Crab Cakes – a well-seasoned and crispy trio of 3-bite deliciousness.
Ravioli was al dente with tender lobster inside. It was in an amenable love triangle with big juicy

prawns and 2 tangy pesto sauces (basil and sun-dried tomato). Some lovely asparagus dotted the plate.

Chicken was stuffed with salty prosciutto and deliciously gamey goat cheese blanketed with tarragon scented cream sauce. It came with mash taters & veggies.
Cutie T reported that her Surf n Turf dish was delightful: steak cooked & seasoned correctly with crispy veg (she opted for more veg and no taters).
Large portions, good service & not too long to wait for dinner. Some free parking in their lot.

Conclusion

Must try restaurant. Take a beach boulevard walk after your meal, and don’t forget to grab an ice cream too.
Footnote
¹Once inside, I realized that I had actually been there before to get takeout last year. Missy R & Nals got takeout of Pecan Crusted Steelhead Trout and Cajun Snapper With Prawns. Both of these were lovely nibbles as well.
²Not actually gruelling

Mondays can feel like a real drag. That’s why we bring Mascara Mondays – to jolt some excitement back into your week.

(Our other reviews are under the Mascara Monday tag.)

Today, I will be reviewing

⇒ ⇒ Length Matters ⇐ ⇐

I am a Julep Maven.* As such, every month, I get a box of polish, skincare or makeup goodies from Julep. So when Length Matters arrived at my door step, I said “Come on in, honey.”

To remind y’all about The Rules of Engagement:

1. We paid for everything ourselves and were not comp’d.
2. 2 coats were used for the photos with same make up.
3. This is just our opinion. Take it or leave it.

The brush: plastic nubs on a plastic base. Julep site describes it more eloquently.

The formula: on the thin side.

Positives:

• Doesn’t clump easily.
• Good price point for Julep Mavens.
• Thin formula = easy application.

Considerations:

• Doesn’t give a luxury coat to the lashes. Julep site says this is buildable colour. So keep applying til you get what you want. (sigh… if only the rest of life was like that…)
• Not readily available in drug stores but easier to find than EyEnvy.

Conclusion:

For lengthening, sure it looks like it does the job.

But we all know it’s also about thickness. So, here it falls short. Can I fault it for something that it doesn’t claim to do? Not really.
So my 2 cents: try it if you are a novice or want natural looking lashes. I wouldn’t go out of my way to buy it. But I’d happily use it if it came in my Maven subscription!
Footnotes:
*if you’d like to try out Julep Maven subscription box, we may be able to get you a few bucks off. Just leave a comment below. And we’ll email you with the deets. (When you leave a comment, the web master will ask for your email. Please don’t post your email in the comments for gen pop to view.)

Have we enticed you to try this mascara?

What are your thoughts?

Clearly, this shibbles-n-bits isn’t just for kindergarteners anymore.

And so… what better time, than Holiday Time!, to discuss shimmery glittery goodness.

Today, we’ll be giving you the lowdown on:

1) BITE’s Prismatic Pearl Crème Gloss
2) smashbox’s Be Legendary Liquid Lip
3) Julep’s Moisturizing LipGloss

.One day, I had me a hankerin’ to get some glitterati. I was directed to the BITE Prismatic Pearl Crème line, with 10 coveted colour choices. The Pink Pearl is a light pink opaque with a suspension of light pink glitter. It has cool white-silvery undertones. The Rose Pearl’s base is a warmer opaque magenta with mesmerizing dual-tone glitter (pink-gold). I can’t quite figure out if the base is golden-hued or if it’s just the glitter. But whatever it is, it’s all fab. These glitter glosses (GGs) have staying power and true colour. (eg: it looked the same on me and Kells, and looked the same as inside the bottle.) The base feels like creamy gloss, and there’s no gritty feel to the glitter. Warning: this line is not for the glitter-shy. It bites you right in the kisser. So, if you’re unsure about glitter, you may want to look at the nibbly alternatives below. Check out our gangsta pic where we’re both sporting the Pink Gold. Kells has layered it on top of Fenty’s Cosmic Gloss Lip Glitter. I’ve layered it on top of Clinique’s Bold Pop matte lip. (Bold Pop is a rich velvety burgundy .)

For Christmas, my lil work SiSter, got me the Sugar Cane* gloss in smashbox’s Be Legendary line. This line has quite the array of colours from a ka-pow brick red to more muted tones. The Sugar Cane base is a full colour warm brown sugar with prismatic micro-glitter. It feels like a creamy slithery gloss (but not as rich as BITE’s). And with a soupçon of glitter. On my skin, this looks like a dark shimmery nude. I’m actually wearing this under a glossy Julep taco** in our Merry Christmas post on our Instagram.

Julep’s translucent GGs are also dreamy. They have pretty good staying power with that yummy glossy feeling. These are generally sheer with super duper fine glitter. There is a choice of 13 colours.  I’ve tried Glowing (coral pink), Charming (deeper rosy brown) and Adored (baby pink). The Julep glosses are great starters for those just getting into gloss and GGs.

Pink Pearl, Rose Pearl, Bold Pop, Sugar Cane, Low Key & Charming: L to R.

THE ANALYSIS

These are all awesome glosses in their own right.

more versatile than you think

What we love about glitter glosses is that are uber versatile. You can wear these:

• straight on your nekkid lip
• on top of lipstick… you can do the full Monty as we have in our gangsta pic, or just dot your centres to highlight
• on top of lipliner
• … get ready to have your mind blown… put a clear gloss on top of the glitter. Yes you heard me right, folks. When you add that clear gloss taco, your lips resemble a shiny marble. It’s glitterati to the max.

Okay so some other considerations…

Kells and I have a gorgeous gal-pal, Lil Kiwi. She is hyperaware of age-appropriateness of makeup and clothing.  She has a lovely porcelain complexion, warm brown mischievous eyes and an infectious AF laugh. However, she gravitates towards a more natural look, anyways, which is always age-appropriate. (Though lately, she’s branched out a bit, which Kells and I love.) So as I myself am approaching a certain number, I had a sad thought: is glitter is out of my age range? After thorough and extensive processing, the light of reason shone upon me.

My conclusion? “My inner diva is channeled and she wants glitter!” and boom! here you have this post^^.

We hope you enjoy exploring these GGs.

Do you have faves that you’d like to rave about?

What are your thoughts? Feel free to leave a comment below!

End bits –for you keeners that look this kinda stuff up–

^(in my head)
* (how appropriate as we are both from lands o’ sugar cane)
** Julep gloss taco: Ultra Hydrating Lipgloss in Low Key
^^ this post is dedicated to all the inner divas out there! Here’s hoping we can out them soon.

[contact-form][contact-field label=”Name” type=”name” required=”true” /][contact-field label=”Email” type=”email” required=”true” /][contact-field label=”Website” type=”url” /][contact-field label=”Message” type=”textarea” /][/contact-form]